Princesses for rent?

My phone rang and the caller’s name appeared. Since today was unusually boring I decided to take the call (on other days, I would have totally ignored this call ).

“Hey, what are you doing for Doughnut’s birthday?” Nice, not even a ‘hello’.
“Nothing much. Just a quiet lunch and maybe a small cake.”
“WHAT, that again?! I thought you’ve already done that last year?” Does that mean if you’ve eaten yesterday, then you won’t be eating again today?
“Yes. Not doing any party. Maybe next year, when she’s older and understands the meaning of birthday.”
“But she will only be 2 years old once in her lifetime!” Agreed. Then why not YOU throw her a party instead.
“I know. We will be spending the whole day with her and it’ll be all about her. I think that’s more meaningful, no offense.” Ok, that was on purpose because we’ve just received her daughter’s scented birthday invitation a few days ago. She has a daughter who’s exactly one week younger than Doughnut.
“But that’s so pitiful…” HUH? Excuse me?
“Yeah, she’s quite deprived.” If you can’t beat them, join them.

“So have you received C’s birthday invitation?” Ok, now we’re getting into the real purpose of this conversation.
“Yeah, could’ve smelled it from afar.” Fact was, we didn’t even let Doughnut touch it.
“So this time we’re doing it at a play land instead. It’ll be a princess-themed party so it’ll be nice if Doughnut could come dressed as one.” Princesses wear pants too right? Then we’re fine.
“I’ll make sure she comes in a pink dress, if that’s what you mean.”
“Oh we have an event organizer who will be renting out accessories and tailor make princesses dresses for the party if you want. Tiaras, fake jewelries, magic wands and all. Very reasonable charges.” Wait, did I hear correctly, RENTING??
“Hmmm…. I wonder if Sofia the First had her purple dress rented too.”
“Sorry, can’t hear you properly. What did you say?” Oh I wasn’t just thinking aloud just now.
“Nothing important. It’s ok.”
“So all 3 of you will be coming?”
“Only if you’re not charging us for parking or valet.” I just couldn’t help it. My mouth has a brain of its own.
“Come earlier. Limited free parking spots, I think.” Oh, perfect.
“Ok, I’ll text you when I can confirm. I gotta go now. Bye.” I’ve heard enough.

Later at night, my husband asked about the party (our husbands are friends too).
“So, are we going?”
“Up to you.” 0% sincerity, I’ll admit.
“Ok, so that’s a NO.”
“But I said its up to you!”
“In your language, that’s a NO. And I know I’m right.”
“And do you agree?”
“Actually I do. I’ll just hand Johnny (not his real name, of course!) an ang pow when I see him.”
“And what excuse will you give him for not attending?”
“That my wife is a grinch and doesn’t want to pay for dresses and tiaras for little girls.”
“How did you know about the renting part?”
“Johnny called me.”
“Just tell them it’s Doughnut’s nap time.” That was the truth. Ok, half of it.
“I knew you’ll have a better excuse. Coz I really didn’t feel like going too…”
“You’re a coward.”
“And married to a grinch.”

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2 Responses to Princesses for rent?

  1. Story Paige says:

    omg! Finally a mom that speaks what so many other moms are thinking. My husband and I share your sentiments on kids’ birthday parties.

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